Firstly, he wrote this blog, about how he wanted to change his name. Yu Phoenix is what I've always known him to be. Even though he says that it's not because he wants to distance himself from Cinema Bizarre, the cynical being that is me can't help but doubt that. I can't imagine calling him anything other than Yu. It's much the same with the likes of Kiro and Shin ... they will always be Kiro and Shin to me, even though they are happy to let people know that they're names are Carsten Schaefer and Marcel Gothow. Honestly, though, I don't know why I'm taking this news so hard, why I'm almost angry at Yu for wanting to change his name. All those jokes with my friends, all those memories of getting out of awkward situations by pretending I said "Yu" instead "you" ... there won't be any more if he changes his name, because he won't be "Yu" any more. He's a lot more connected with his fans than Kiro and Shin are, who only tweet every once in a while. He's right out there - twitter, youtube, blogspot ... I feel more of a connection to him than I do the other band members, because he's more involved. He lets us see into his life, small snippets of what's going on that make him more than just "a member of CB" (not that he was ever just that to me). Even if he does change his name, which I sincerely hope he doesn't, he'll always be Yu to me, as he will always be to many other fans, I'm sure.
This was soon followed by the news that Rouge Morgue, a band which Yu and Romeo were to be a part of with some other people, wouldn't be happening. Now, truth be told, I wasn't overly excited for RM. It was taking Yu and Romeo one step further away from Cinema Bizarre, making reality that little bit more real, and I hated that. I wanted to stay in my fantasy world where Jess and I will go to a Cinema Bizarre concert for my sixteenth birthday and get backstage passes to meet the band, where we spend too much money buying new albums from Amazon, where we annoy our friends by squealing over the new photoshoots of the gorgeous lads and singing new lyrics at the tops of our tone-deaf lungs. I didn't want to leave that place, but Rouge Morgue was going to force me. Even so, I was saddened that things didn't work out.
And then, Yu posts this blog post. I saw it exactly two minutes after he posted it - just a little funfact. It contains, in brackets, "(not a break up, a break, we wont be gone forever)". This is regarding Cinema Bizarre, naturally. Now, I'm not one to believe rumours, but I was almost certain that, even if a band called Cinema Bizarre resurfaced, it wouldn't be our Cinema Bizarre, the one we know and love, the one with Strify, Kiro, Shin, Yu and Romeo. Our Cinema Bizarre, the real one, broke up back in January. I want to believe Yu, that it's just a break and they're all going to get back together eventually. My heart is screaming at me to believe him. But my brain is yelling at me, overpowering my heart, that he's lying and my hopes will be crushed and my heart will break again upon hearing the news that Cinema Bizarre won't come back ... or that Cinema Bizarre has come back, but with a change in members. CB won't be CB without Kiro and his upturned nose, Shin with his seemingly childlike innocence, Strify with his breathtaking vocals, Yu with his yummy uniqueness, the fanservice (I'm a teenage girl. Of course I like the fanservice) ... it just wouldn't be right.
Yu, if you're reading this (which I doubt), I wish you the best. Whichever road you decide to take, I'll support, no matter how hesitant or disappointed I may be. No matter what name you take or what bands you become a part of, you'll always be Yu to me, and I'll always remember you as that crazy, kick-ass guitarist from some German band who got their name from a movie genre. I love you, Yu. You'll always be an inspiration to me.
hello there.
ReplyDeleteoh wow, i do not know what to say, i only just came across your blog. i'm a fellow cinema bizarre fan as well. i find yu externally beautiful. i will also be writing a post about him soon. and i definitely agree, he is awesome. he is who he is.
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Hey there,
ReplyDeleteI stumbled across this on his comments to his blog. I think some people don't realize that all of the CB guys are in their early 20's, and speaking as a person being in my early 20's as well, it is a time of rediscovering yourself. Emerging from the child and teenager that you were, and going forth into the adult you want to become, it is a time of constant change to find what is truly right for you. To be honest, you never stop changing during your life, and if you don't, then you have no life. When you reach that time, you may understand him a lot better. So I went on a total tangent there :).
However, I think that Yu is telling the truth when he says they will be back. I am a natrual cynic myself, but normally when a band breaks up, the band memebers wouldn't fiercelly defend that the band will be back. He is fiercelly defending it, and posting it everywhere, as other CB members have said in other places. they are just young guys that wanted a break, and try some other things first. Give them a year or two, and I bet there will be some rumors or workings of them coming back together. They are all natural performers, and they will all miss the stage and performing on that level.
Also, from experience, when you look up to someone, always remember that they are human, and have faults just like everyone else. Once you learn it that first time, it is easier to look up to someone and not be easily disappointed by them. Give him some credit for wanting to make himself better.
I do get where you are coming from with all of this, and your feelings aren't wrong. We should just be thankful that one of the members are talking about it, and keeping us involved with their lives. The other four have clammed up, and don't seem to care that they have disappointed their fans. Yu does.
There is a crappy part about this that Yu has been dealt. He seems to have to break all the bad news about RM and Romeo. It seems the others can't speak up for themselves, are too ashamed, or just pushed everything on to him to announce.
All of his fans should give him alot of love and support for being so faithful to his fans. I believe that you will heal just fine after getting all of your feelings out about the situation.
Have a good day!
Kinonai
i like your blog
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