Stress

 I've been really stressed lately, for no apparent reason. I've been snappy at school, and even my not-so-close friends are noticing I'm not myself (which is honestly a shocker; they never notice anything). I don't know ... I have nothing in my life to make me stressed. Exams aren't for another two weeks, and I don't usually get stressed over exams anyway (Hell, I don't even revise for half of my subjects... just a quick glance in my book the night before). My friend might be moving half way across the country, but that's not a reason to get stressed - upset, yes, but not stressed. Everyone's obsessed with who I fancy (no one, but the list of rumoured crushes I have is ridiculous), which is a reason to get annoyed, not stressed. We're not getting excessive homework - but even the simple bits make me want to cry and crawl into a corner to avoid them - and I'm not struggling in lessons.

I haven't had a period for three months, now, so it can't be PMT playing with my emotions (although truthfully, I don't get PMT much), and there's nothing bad going on at home. My granddad's recovered from his operation wonderfully - too fast, if you ask me - and I haven't fallen out with anyone. I got an amazing school report, and Mum and I are looking for a new laptop since mine keeps breaking. I'm going to a Pink concert at the end of the month that I should be excited for, and I am, but not as excited as I should be. I'm going on a trip with nine people from Science Set One later this month. It's my best friend's birthday this Sunday, for God's sake. I didn't get into the France Shine Day trip, but I'm not fussed, because I'd rather stay at school and do the European Day with Mitch than go to France with Abby (yeah, so Jess and Kelly are going, to, but Abby drives me up the wall).

I've been writing a lot in my notebooks, starting projects that I probably wouldn't have started for a while if the laptop hadn't broken, and I get inspired really easily now. I've been reading a bit, mainly the Philosopher's Stone, which I'm reading for the Book Club on HPFC, and I've even starting playing Guardian's Crusade* on the Playstation 2, which I hadn't played for so long that I had to wipe the dust out of the controller to play it.

I should be happy, jumping off the walls with excitement, eagerly staring at my calendar as the days dwindle past, wishing it would hurry up. But I'm not. I'm always tired, I zone out and forget things way more than usual, I can't even be bothered to read much (and I'm reading the Harry Potter series, and the Alex Rider series, for God's sake! Two amazing series! I should be glued to those books!). I have tons of ideas bouncing around my head, but I have no energy to put half of them on paper. I snap at people, I get headaches easily, I complain more often, and I just want to crawl into bed.

And I don't know why.

Now, I have Art homework to complete for tomorrow that I've been putting off for ages, so I'd better get on with that. Keep blogging!

P.S. I found this on dA, and it made me smile... so I thought I'd share it. Click here to see it, I'm having trouble getting it to show on the blog, so I'm linking it in instead.

*it's a PS1 game, but it's easily one of my favourites - no matter how many times I re-start it, it never gets boring, even though I easily understand the opening demo scene (which tells the story without actually telling it) from the amount of times I've finished the game. I can't say the same for any other game, except Kingdom Hearts.